Good Behaviour Popup Disabled

I have disabled the task to periodically pop up a spreadsheet to record good behaviour. In the 6 days it has been active, I have not recorded a single event. I have even struggled to remember what exactly I meant by "good behaviour". Turns out to be an unhelpful pest, so I have stopped it. It was a worthwhile experiment, though.

Another Late Night And Rule Change To Prevent Recurrence

I was up with my son until 21:00 last night, and then my wife put him to bed. However - because I had actually been using my PC as 21:00 passed, the rules didn't trigger, and I didn't set a time to stop using it. Ended up going to bed well after midnight. To prevent a recurrence, I am modifying the relevant rule as follows:

* when an activity finishes after 21:00 (footy, TV programme etc), switching on a PC (or continuing to use PC if you've been doing something on it with A) triggers an immediate forfeit (healthy sleep cycle trumps what other people think is important)

Regarding the idea in the previous entry about automatically opening a spreadsheet to record instances of good behaviour: so far, it's not working. Yesterday, the spreadsheet popped up while I was screen sharing with a work colleague during the day, and during the evening, it popped up while my son was playing a concentration game using the Neurosky EEG headset.

Recognising Small Achievements

This good, short article strongly recommends recognising small achievements. To accomplish this, I will use the Windows task scheduler to pop up a spreadsheet to fill in every four hours to record them.

Disasterous Late Night

Was ready to go to bed at 22:00, PC switched off - but then I decided to just switch on and see how the Walsall game finished (of all things!). Then got browsing about LP, and ended up going upstairs at 00:00 (bed by 00:40). Guess what? Everything has started late today.

Slip ups can be VERY expensive.

Take Socks To Bathroom

Used Neurosky headset with my son last night. Connectivity was a major issue - getting it and keeping it. I need to experiment a little on my own to see how it relates to the position of the probe on the head (both in the games and on the Windows notification tray indicator).

From tonight, I will be trying a new tactic for the cold-feet-in-bed issue: I will take thick socks to the bathroom and, as soon as my feet are dry, put them on to keep my feet warm. A minor thing - but applying innovation to improve things is a major part of a good experience of life.

I have started a spreadsheet to record small instances of good behaviour. So far, I haven't remembered to use it yet.

I haven't been concentrating very well at my work this week. Much of this undoubtedly relates to fatigue - it would be wonderful to string a few good nights of sleep together! In the meantime, perhaps practising with the Neurosky headset and using concentration music will help.

The usage of habits: you'll have heard this before - but IMO the way I'm presenting the information here is subtly, but importantly, different. The old way is to tell you that repeating a behaviour pattern for 3 weeks creates a habit - which is true, but overwhelming and demotivating. My way is to tell you that willpower, like attention, is approximately a zero sum game - if it is applied to something, there will be less of it available for something else. However, a habit does not drain the daily supply of willpower - so turning a behaviour pattern that is needed regularly, and which normally requires willpower, into a habit becomes an optimisation issue! (info link)

Quick Update

In general, behaviour not ideal - but MASSIVELY better than the time before this programme started (about the time of the start of this blog).

A matter that has arisen - I seem to have a lot of anger lately about things which are nothing to do with me - e.g. items in the news relating to the economy, energy market, or things like that. Beware of going onto somebody else's agenda!!!

Two additional small items on the programme - I am now washing when A goes to bed so that I won't have cold feet when I go to bed, and I have created a spreadsheet as a place to record good things that I do, as a way to give myself a small reward for them, by at least acknowledging and recording them.

Quick And Positive Update

The tone of my recent posts has probably been more pessimistic than it should be: I am FAR more likely to do something useful now than previously - when visiting forums was a Pavlovian reaction to a natural break of any sort. If I hadn't been ill for the last few weeks, it's entirely possible that I'd be crowing about almost unbelievable progress now.

I am curious as to whether the fatigue the sickness is causing is affecting my results on Neurosky EEG tests. While I am able to get peak concentration of over 90%, I am finding it more difficult to sustain the measured concentration than the measured "meditation".

Cause for hope: my son, while still coughing a little this morning, was wide awake and full of energy! I had also got better - but then it worsened again - but maybe it will get better again soon.

Still Unwell

Have been unwell for weeks now (as have wife and young son) with a chesty cough. The big problem is that it causes asthma, which prevents me from getting a full night of sleep. If it continues, I will have to ask the doctor for stronger asthma medication. It's causing tiredness and reduced general health.

Apart from this, progress is generally steady (yes - there is back sliding - but it's not easy to say how much of this is down to sickness). The Neurosky headset is fun to use, and useful. At 17:00 yesterday I was overwhelmed with fatigue, but after a few minutes using Visualizer and Neuroboy, I felt much better. My biggest complaint about the headset is the limited nature of the free software for it (Visualizer and Neuroboy are the best of the bunch - I need to give the other programs a proper try. maybe they can be used for party games!).

More Rules - Soon, There Will Be Too Many Of Them

In today's self improvement session, I focused on:

* slippage: I have been getting into the habit of pushing back the time limits in the existing rules (e.g. a time limit of 21:45 could be pushed to 22:15 to allow for more reading time)

* cold feet. After doing ablutions, my feet are too cold to sleep

My expanded rules are now as follows:

1. at 09:00, set a time to start being productive, on pain of forfeit
2. lunch starts at 12:00, forfeit if not productive again by 14:00, unless a work issue arises during lunch break, in which case set a new time on calendar
3. to avoid cold feet, you do ablutions when A goes to bed
4. at 21:00, set a completion time in calendar by 21:05
5. when an activity finishes after 21:00 (footy, TV programme etc), switching on a PC triggers an immediate forfeit (healthy sleep cycle trumps what other people think is important)
6. "being productive" means just that - YOU MUST BE ACTUALLY WORKING!
7. no pushing time back! You must either save the reading, or categorise it as either "actionable" or "not actionable". Pushing time back triggers forfeit.

As is obvious, the rules are becoming numerous and complicated. At the next meeting, I will consider reducing them, or using automatic reminders. It may be that continued usage of them will make me familiar with them anyway - but they're not the kind of things I'm likely to remember in the heat of battle.

My NeuroSky headset has arrived. The software for it takes quite a bit of setting up, and I haven't had a proper chance to try the best programs for it yet.

The state of the nation: making steady progress (and to be fair to myself, I have been very ill with a nasty chesty cough that makes breathing difficult). However, I am concerned that there might be a bigger problem that all this self-work will always help only temporarily.

Getting Back On Track

Right - I am still unwell - but having had a couple of nights of decent sleep (quantity and quality), I am no longer feeling dog tired. I have also modified the rules a little to clarify that work time limit means WORKING by that time limit!

Here are the new rules:

1. at 09:00, set a time to start being productive*, on pain of forfeit
2. lunch starts at 12:00, forfeit if not productive* again by 14:00, unless a work issue arises during lunch break, in which case set a new time on calendar
3. at 21:00, set a completion time in calendar by 21:05
4. when an activity finishes after 21:00 (footy, TV programme etc), switching on a PC triggers an immediate forfeit (healthy sleep cycle trumps what other people think is important)

• *actually working! This is VERY important, because idling can very easily slip into inquisitive browsing

The above makes another self-knowledge point: I am highly inquisitive - and this is a major reason why I can easily slip into unproductive browsing. Generally, curiosity is a good thing - but it must be balanced with productive work.

Another piece of news - today I have ordered the Neurosky headset, which can measure EEG patterns. It will enable me to train myself to relax and, separately, to concentrate. It will be interesting to see how much it helps.

Uh oh...

I had feared that this might happen. Big failure to be productive today - and two forfeits.

Trying to be positive: when I'm motivated, I often succeed - for example, beating gum disease.

Today's problems:

1. being too tired. Not sure why - went to bed at a reasonable time. Haven't been very well - but still surprising

2. mixing up what's allowable under the rules with what isn't.

Rule Set Complete At The Moment

To quickly summarise where I am (see previous posts for details): after years of lack of success in improving self control, which included reading many books, I took an online psychometric test which caused me to think that I'm basically going to have to solve my issues myself!

To my genuine surprise, this "debugging" has been going unbelievably well! Using the basic idea of establishing some rules that I believe that I can follow, and implementing only small forfeits for when they're not met (so that I know that the forfeits will be carried out), I have made a lot of progress.

The other big problem that I hadn't yet tackled was getting myself to bed at a reasonable time when an activity took me past the previous rule that prescribed behaviour at 21:00, and I have now implemented a rule to cover this as well - and even that is working!

Here are the current rules in full:

1. at 09:00, set a time to finish browsing, on pain of forfeit
2. lunch starts at 12:00, forfeit if not productive again by 14:00, unless a work issue arises during lunch break, in which case set a new time on calendar
3. at 21:00, set a completion time in calendar by 21:05
4. when an activity finishes after 21:00 (footy, TV programme etc), switching on a PC triggers an immediate forfeit (healthy sleep cycle trumps what other people think is important)

Simple but effective. So far, so good. My confidence is such that I am widening the gap to the next self-assessment meeting to 3 days.

Progress Report

In short, progress on getting to bed at a reasonable time has been ASTONISHING - and I have kept to my resolution to stop posting at forums. I have visited a couple of times after I said I would stop, and this is for two reasons: in the "real world", the iOS v Android battle has flared up in a big way - and it is genuinely very exciting! Unfortunately, my adversary, the Fanboy, has quoted one of my posts, even though he knows I have vowed to stop visiting - but I'm not going to reply, because I know full well that if I do, it will never end. In the other forum, I posted a new poll without a time limit - but that seems to have stopped getting new posts or votes. I have just resolved to not visit either forum again until 17:00 on Friday - I want to be out of the habit of visiting them ASAP, but not miss any further responses to any of my own posts.

With those two time and energy killers seemingly under control, it's time to look at the other big issue - getting to work as soon as work time rolls around. Since self-administered threat of small forfeits has worked well for bedtime, I will apply the same method for starting work at the correct time as well. It probably wouldn't work if I was a more generous person - but since it does work, I will use it. Common alternatives are unavailable to me. I cannot, for example, ask another person to monitor me, because I cannot run even the tiniest risk that either my family or my employer discover that I have been slack about starting work at the correct time.

My bedtime method is to use the Windows Task Scheduler to require a target bedtime by 21:00, a check that this has been done at 21:05, and then I use the Google Calendar to monitor that I hit the target set on pain of a small forfeit (it is surprising that the threat of a small forfeit (small enough for me to know for sure that it WILL be carried out!) works - but it does - so I am grateful for having devised this method).

Thus, my plan for good starts is as follows:

* alert at 9:00 for start time
* check done at 9:05
* alert for lunch break at 12:00
* check done at 12:05
* forfeit if not working again by 14:00

Update 25-Oct-11: morning start and lunchtime control both used today - and both worked. These simple ideas genuinely have the potential to make big, important changes to my life!

The Utter Futility Of Me Supporting A Football Team

Went to the pub to watch Wolves v Swansea. Missed the first 15 mins - the telly wasn't tuned. Eventually, two of the bar staff got the game on a Greek channel, and said "This proves that women can be technical too!".

Wolves went two goals down, and I started to reflect on how unrewarding following a football team is. Our manager (Mick McCarthy) is stupid: few of our attacks looked dangerous, whereas all of theirs did. The reason supporters love him is his way of talking, and the fact that many of Wolves recent managers have actually been even worse than him.

I'm not from Wolverhampton, I have no friends who support either Wolves or a related team, and, in truth, they are a very ordinary Premiership team. My support for them comes from an earlier time when I didn't know any better. A major part of being successful is "cutting your losses", rather than keeping them and letting them become a millstone.

I have recently read the James Altucher blog on the value of being grateful - and as the misery grew, I reflected that I should be grateful for all this insight as a time-saver!

Wolves eventually scored 2 goals in the last 5 mins to equalise. Still an absolutely disgusting result - as anything less than winning would have been.

Life Changing Discovery

On Monday (17-Oct-11), I discovered the Big Five Personality test. What it showed me is that I am in the bottom percentile for "agreeableness". Suddenly, everything became clear - after all these years! I am never going to be popular on forums, despite the fact that I often prepare my posts with great care - so I'll stop frequenting those - they're for people with strong herding instincts - not for the likes of me.

It also made me realise that nobody whom I don't pay very well (which I cannot afford) will ever be able to help me but myself - so I have started daily self-improvement sessions for myself. As improvement comes, I anticipate being able to reduce the frequency of them. Already I believe I've got a handle on getting myself to go to bed earlier - so far, this completely unexpected revelation (I found the personality test on an aggregation blog - and VERY nearly didn't do it!) has done nothing but good for me!!!